6 Easy Steps to Become a Bromigo

I stole the idea for this from Thad Castle.

If you want to be a bro (we all do) you're gonna need to follow a few simple instructions. You might be asking yourself, what makes you the expert on bros? And my answer to that is trust me I'm a bro, and bros trust their bros.

Step 1: Get your swoll on. All bros go to the gym cause it's a great place to hang out with your bros and get huge. Some say Golds is the place but all the greats started in small, old, crappy gyms. Just watch Rocky so for me, I would suggest AF Rec.

Step 2: Love the movie "Warrior". I'll be the first to admit, Warrior has some of the worst acting of any film ever produced, but come on, Tommy's a badass! That's why bros watch movies to see dudes get knocked out in one punch. If you're a girl and want to start a conversation with a bro just go up to him and ask, "wanna go to my place and watch Warrior?" It works every time.

Step 3: If you've ever said "totes", you are disqualified from bro membership.

Step 4: Don't make a big deal about little things. Oh one of your bros just hooked up with your ex-girlfriend? It's fine he's your bro. You're the only one with enough gas to make it up to Hooters? Drive your bros up there, bro.

Step 5: All bros can quote Workaholics like it's nothing, DVR that show brochacho.

Step 6: Bros never die. And by that I mean the bonds of friendship, sure you might make fun of your bros sometimes but at the end of the day you're a BROtherhood so act like it.

Jillian: "Blake what's the tightest thing in the world?"
Blake: "A butthole,"
Jillian: "Yes, ideally, a butthole. But do you wanna know what else is tight? The bonds of a family."

If you follow these 6 easy steps you'll be well on your way to the brothership. Your bros are your family, yes, even Zach so

BRO THE F UP.

Twitter Fights

Twitter fights are great when you win. You feel super witty but what you don't want to do is get a whole band's fan base coming at you. I had 212 followers when I decided to start a twitter fight with some Blink-182 guy with a lip ring. He also has 3000 followers, my account got shut down because I guess too many people reported me and now I had to make a new twitter an now I have 50 followers. Moral of the story is only get in twitter fights with people less popular than you.

I Remember June

I remember 7 am workouts.
I remember trying to get faster and stronger every day.
I remember going home soaked in sweat.
I remember Coach McGeary not believing in us.
I remember that there's only 4 5A teams left.
I remember how lucky I am.
I remember how much hard work it took.
I remember coughing for an hour after practice cause my lungs couldn't handle it.
I remember the freindships I made with all my teammates.
I remember that win or lose is irrelevant.
I remember having a 2 hour meeting after the PG game.
I remember promising to change.
We haven't lost since.
I remember when a chick told my friend to dye his leg hair.
I remember thinking "what the hell?"
I remember laughing and having a good time with my teammates.
I remember feeling like brothers.
I remember what it feels like to have "State Champs" on my finger.
I remember I'll do anything it takes to feel that feeling again.

REGULATORS!!!!!

Mount up.

BRICKS

I'm not a brick, somebody lied. iPhone 4s, but now I need that 5. New apple products every week, what's the difference? It can't be that much better. Steve Jobs is dead. Apple makes billions, he built that company from the ground up, brick by brick. Do they have iPhones in heaven or is Steve Jobs in hell. He had to cut some people off to sit in his garage and build computers, he probably missed some of his friends birthday parties, cake is good.

DUCK TAPE
DUCT TAPE

what's a duct?

DUCK LIFE

The Buck Stops Here

Jason Buck has arrived. The mustache is in the building, I repeat Super Bowl Champion Defensive End for the Washington Redskins, Jason Buck is the new Defensive Coordinator for Lone Peak. Who would've thought after 8 games we would have 3 Defensive Coordinators it's pretty crazy. Jason has wanted to coach us for a while now I think but Coach McGeary finally got desperate enough to ask him to come coach. He played in the NFL so he knows what he's talking about, also he's great at getting us pumped up. When one coach dies another coach is born.

The cons are we have 1 more practice to put in a whole new system. Defense isn't like offense though.  Defenders don't have to think out there we just REACT. So it's better to have a new DC every week than it would to have a new OC. I know Jason puts in the time watching film at his house and I have no doubt he will do everything he can to have our D ready. Last week against PG we could afford a loss, not this week though. The next 2 games will determine if we go into the playoffs as a 1 seed or go down the freakin toilet.

I love my teammates. After our PG game we had a players only meeting and I'm not going to go into detail about what we talked about but we are all refocused and working our butts off in practice. I just got back from a 4 hour practice so I'm confident we'll be ready to play Riverton. We're too talented to be stopped and right now all I can think about is Riverton and Jason always says to go to sleep and think about making that big play, so that's what I'm going to do, also I'm sorry to anybody who came out to watch the PG game and saw us play like crap and I promise this week will be different so please come. I think we may have something special.

Extra 1

I never know what to write for my second one and this is a terrible intro. I'm just not creative like all these kids in my class who write top notch blogs. You guys are great and I wish I could be more like you indies. Sincerely, Not Indie. #ceelogreen