"Stripling Warriors"

This week Portland (my jj team) faces off against the "stripling warriors" and tough names aside, we are going to murder them. I just hope this one kid on our team that kinda snuck his way on doesn't mess around like he did last year because I want to sore 100 points! (as a team) as myself I have to score 4 points every game but I'm up to the challenge. My plan is to be really dirty when the ref  looks away so when I get the ball I get fouled super hard. Then I just need to make my foul shots. Easy enough right? Well I've been shooting free throws and hopefully I go 1/2 or 2/2 on every trip to the line. Well that's it. See ya

Creative Chair

6 Easy Steps to Become a Bromigo

I stole the idea for this from Thad Castle.

If you want to be a bro (we all do) you're gonna need to follow a few simple instructions. You might be asking yourself, what makes you the expert on bros? And my answer to that is trust me I'm a bro, and bros trust their bros.

Step 1: Get your swoll on. All bros go to the gym cause it's a great place to hang out with your bros and get huge. Some say Golds is the place but all the greats started in small, old, crappy gyms. Just watch Rocky so for me, I would suggest AF Rec.

Step 2: Love the movie "Warrior". I'll be the first to admit, Warrior has some of the worst acting of any film ever produced, but come on, Tommy's a badass! That's why bros watch movies to see dudes get knocked out in one punch. If you're a girl and want to start a conversation with a bro just go up to him and ask, "wanna go to my place and watch Warrior?" It works every time.

Step 3: If you've ever said "totes", you are disqualified from bro membership.

Step 4: Don't make a big deal about little things. Oh one of your bros just hooked up with your ex-girlfriend? It's fine he's your bro. You're the only one with enough gas to make it up to Hooters? Drive your bros up there, bro.

Step 5: All bros can quote Workaholics like it's nothing, DVR that show brochacho.

Step 6: Bros never die. And by that I mean the bonds of friendship, sure you might make fun of your bros sometimes but at the end of the day you're a BROtherhood so act like it.

Jillian: "Blake what's the tightest thing in the world?"
Blake: "A butthole,"
Jillian: "Yes, ideally, a butthole. But do you wanna know what else is tight? The bonds of a family."

If you follow these 6 easy steps you'll be well on your way to the brothership. Your bros are your family, yes, even Zach so

BRO THE F UP.

Twitter Fights

Twitter fights are great when you win. You feel super witty but what you don't want to do is get a whole band's fan base coming at you. I had 212 followers when I decided to start a twitter fight with some Blink-182 guy with a lip ring. He also has 3000 followers, my account got shut down because I guess too many people reported me and now I had to make a new twitter an now I have 50 followers. Moral of the story is only get in twitter fights with people less popular than you.

I Remember June

I remember 7 am workouts.
I remember trying to get faster and stronger every day.
I remember going home soaked in sweat.
I remember Coach McGeary not believing in us.
I remember that there's only 4 5A teams left.
I remember how lucky I am.
I remember how much hard work it took.
I remember coughing for an hour after practice cause my lungs couldn't handle it.
I remember the freindships I made with all my teammates.
I remember that win or lose is irrelevant.
I remember having a 2 hour meeting after the PG game.
I remember promising to change.
We haven't lost since.
I remember when a chick told my friend to dye his leg hair.
I remember thinking "what the hell?"
I remember laughing and having a good time with my teammates.
I remember feeling like brothers.
I remember what it feels like to have "State Champs" on my finger.
I remember I'll do anything it takes to feel that feeling again.